hope and a future...

Praise God! I am simply in awe of the events of the last several days.

Monday's round of pre-op testing was smooth and easy even though Camilla was suspecting something at this point. They did everything, including the finger pricks and drawing blood, without so much as a wimper from her. AMAZING

We checked in at 5:30 on Tuesday and despite the 'hurry up and wait' mentality of the hospital Camilla remained calm and happy. In fact as we said goodbye at the operating room door she was smiling and laughing at our kisses, tears, whispers and bear hugs (btw those were some of the hardest moments of my life but that's another post). She was then wheeled off into the room and she never looked back. An hour later surgery began. We were updated with phone calls every hour and a-half with the option to call back anytime to check. Every call brought good news and a nearer end to surgery. Then came the best surprise of the day, we had just returned from the cafeteria when we looked up to see Dr. Blount walking through the doors with a smile on his face. He shared the news that surgery was complete and had gone well. He was able to do a 'complete cc' with minimal blood loss and no complications- we could see her in about an hour. And that we did - the first vision of her being wheeled down the hall into the PICU was one I will never forget - not at all a moment of sorrow or sadness but of peace - she looked at peace - I felt at peace and as I leaned down and whispered I love you her heart monitor picked up the pace and my heart melted. She was promptly whisked off and we were left to wait for visiting hours.

Upon our first visit to the PICU we found her still sleeping and in the next few hours she was in and out of sleep but mostly out. Visiting hours ended and it would be two more hours before we were allowed to see her again. When we returned for that visit we found that due to an emergency in PICU visitation was closed. We called to check and she was wide awake and looking around - not upset - just awake. This was hard because she really 'woke up' from anesthesia during this time and we were not able to be with her. I still cringe when I think that she might have been wondering 'where's mama?' and not be able to communicate that to anyone in the room.

After just a few calls with questions from PICU through the night, our next visit came this morning at 8:30 when the doors opened again. She had just woken up and seemed happy to see us although she promptly became frustrated, aggitated and upset (I think she thought we would get her and leave). Then came the process of removing 2 of the IV's, the cathater, monitors and headress. After all this and getting into her pj's she felt MUCH better, napped again and then began the slow process of trying to drink and eat again. It wasn't until Fer Fer brought her a box of fruit roll-ups that she really felt like eating and then again when the nurse ordered her tomatoes :) she was one happy chick after that!

Although the transfer orders were written first thing this morning we are just now settling into a room - it's 9:30 PM. She is finally asleep and seems to be resting well. She has been very lethargic today but is more awake and alert than you would expect the day after brain surgery. She has said 'dog' several times and tried to mouth several other words. Her left side is weak and she is not moving it as much as the right but we know that is temporary. She has not been in much pain and is only requiring Tylenol and MOtrin at this time. Her face is swelling and her eyes are begining to be 'black'. Her scalp is still bandaged over the incision so we have not really had a chance to look at it (but no drain). Her head is shaved in a very small patch (I just found the bag where they saved the hair they shaved:) on the top of her head. To describe the approach, put your finger between your eyebrows then go about half way to the back of the head that's where your corpus callosum is and they went in straight down from the top of the head.

Camilla is such a fighter - such a strong little fighter - and that's working to her advantage right now. Dr. Blount said she is on the 'fast track' to getting out of here and Dr. Kim flippantly mentioned Friday. That would be great but we do have a long way to go yet.

The calls, the texts, the visits, the prayers, the people who came to sit with us during the surgery - words don't express my gratitude. Thank you all for sharing this with us - and what a joyful time it was when we recieved the good news. Bro. Allen I will never forget the words of the prayer that followed Dr. Blount's visit - what a wonderful time of praise and giving thanks to the Lord.

And let me tell you about facebook - everyone says fb birthdays are the best but they are wrong - fb prayers are even better. The first time I logged in and saw everyone's profile pics were pics of Camilla and the prayer chain that was circulating and the posts to my wall (btw the notification button doesn't go higher than 100) and the personal messages and the new friend requests and Jeremiah 29:11 everywhere I looked - I just cried every time. You people are great - you sure know how to spread awareness and make people feel loved and supported.

I remain amazed at the power of prayer. There is no other way to describe the peace that surrounded me and Brandon and our families yesterday and the calm that was felt by those who waited with us. We had only one moment of uncontrollable tears and fears at the OR doors but even then there was no question that this was the right thing for Camilla and calm quickly returned and peace restored. Only by the prayers of others is this possible. Thank you does not do justice to the emotions felt for those who prayed and are praying.

Wow - long post. I think the only topic I haven't covered yet is seizures. I'm afraid to type the words - so far 'no seizures'. We remain cautiously optomistic. I'll try to be better at posting for the remainder of our stay and I'll try to cover the topics I've forgotten tomorrow.

"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you HOPE and a FUTURE." Jeremiah 29:11